


The Choices We Make

by virdant



Series: Hitman!AU [1]
Category: Johnny's Entertainment, KAT-TUN (Band)
Genre: Alternate Universe, Character Death, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2010-07-07
Updated: 2010-07-07
Packaged: 2017-11-22 22:14:06
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,255
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/614934
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/virdant/pseuds/virdant
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Junno is a hitman. Nakamaru is an undercover cop.</p>
            </blockquote>





	The Choices We Make

**Author's Note:**

> Written for the JE AU meme, prompt [here](http://je-memes.livejournal.com/1006.html?thread=32750#t32750).

**Title:** The Choices We Make  
 **Author:** [](http://virdant.livejournal.com/profile)[**virdant**](http://virdant.livejournal.com/)  
 **Length:** 3303 words; one-shot  
 **Rating:** PG-13  
 **Genre:** AU, gen  
 **Pairing:** Nakamaru/Junno if you read between the lines (and tilt your head to the left)  
 **Summary:** Junno is a hitman. Nakamaru is an undercover cop.  
 **Warning:** Character death.  
 **Notes:** Written for the JE AU meme, prompt [here](http://je-memes.livejournal.com/1006.html?thread=32750#t32750). Re-posted here because I'm kinda anal when it comes to organization like that.

**The Choices We Make**

“It’s really rather simple,” Junno says as he carefully lays out six knives in a row. He beams at Nakamaru.

Nakamaru watches Junno carefully, waiting for him to continue.

“We figured it out almost instantly,” Junno continues, still smiling. It’s disconcerting, seeing a finely trained killing machine smiling so brightly. It’s what led to Nakamaru’s downfall. Junno laughs a little, flipping his hair out of his eyes. “I suppose it wasn’t your fault you were sent in with inadequate information though.”

Nakamaru waits. If it was anybody other than Junno interrogating him, he might have been trembling, but it’s not anybody else. It’s Junno, and he remembers Junno adjusting his grip on a gun in the shooting range only a week ago, telling him, “You’re my favorite, you know?”

Junno laughs. “Too bad you’re a traitor, Maru. I really liked you.”

Nakamaru smiles a little. “Can’t betray you if I was never with you in the first place.” He would have never had the nerve to say this a few months ago, before he met Junno and the others. He’s changed from this place, and despite the blood on his hands, he doesn’t regret it.

“That’s true.” Junno picks up a knife, studying the play of the single fluorescent bulb along the metal. “I’ll give you one chance to repent.”

Nakamaru shakes his head. “I have nothing to repent for.” He doesn’t. Junno knows this too. He doesn’t regret this at all.

*

It had taken the police a good number of years before they had finally decided to actually infiltrate local gang that was slowly gaining power. In part, that was because Commissioner Yamashita was childhood friends with suspected gang member Akanishi’s, but it was also because there simply wasn’t enough information about the gang.

But then Officer Nishikido managed to get a lead and the entire division was scrambling to put a man inside. “One in a lifetime opportunity,” Yamashita said. “We need to pick our best man for the job.” He added, “But since all of you are talented, let’s just pick lots to decide who to send in.”

If it was truly the best man for the job going in, then it wouldn’t have been Nakamaru, or even who they ended up picking. But since they were picking lots, they ended up picking Koyama, who was one of the sweetest men you would ever meet, and Nakamaru owed him about ten favors.

Nakamaru ended up going in his place.

Nakamaru was new to the team—not so new that he wasn’t trusted with such an operation, but new enough that Nishikido ended up spending a good three weeks shoving files and dossiers down Nakamaru’s throat before giving him a very very rough course in “How to Talk like a Gangster.” Nakamaru wasn’t certain that he needed the course on how to talk, but he obediently took notes all the same. At the end of the three weeks, he was deemed ready for duty. Nakamaru didn’t feel ready, but he agreed with Yamashita and Nishikido when they said he was.

Nakamaru didn’t like conflict.

*

Nishikido had said that Nakamaru would have no problem getting into the gang, he had everything set up.

Nakamaru was too polite to disagree when he met Ueda Tatsuya.

Ueda didn’t _look_ like your typical gangster. He looked more like one of those pop idols with their faces plastered all over the subway stations, but most pop idols didn’t hold guns to people’s heads on their first meeting. Most pop idols also probably met strangers in nice high-rise buildings, not half-abandoned alleyways late at night with the streetlights broken and flickering.

“Uh.... hi,” Nakamaru managed, trying to remember Nishikido’s lectures on “How to Talk like a Gangster.”

“Nishikido told me about you,” Ueda said briskly. “Said you might be a good fit.”

Nakamaru blinked. If Nishikido was on talking terms with gangsters, why was he going in and not Nishikido?

Ueda snorted. “I have no idea why that dwarf would have thought so. You’re clearly incompetent. Probably wants to pull us down so Kanjani can take over more turf. Kanjani’s been dying ever since Uchi got locked in jail for _drunk driving_.”

Nakamaru shut his mouth and waited.

Ueda whirled on a heel and started to stalk away. “Well? Are you coming or not?” He demanded over his shoulder. Nakamaru hurried to catch up.

*

“You’ll trail Junno for a while,” Ueda said, pointing Nakamaru towards a tall lanky figure with bright blond hair standing by the door. Ueda himself was sitting on a rickety metal chair, scribbling what looked like music notes on a piece of paper.

“Uh.... hi,” Nakamaru muttered from where he was standing awkwardly in front of Ueda.

“Is that all you can say?” Ueda demanded. “Never mind. Junno, show him around and figure out what he’s good for.”

“Sure!” Junno said cheerfully. Junno didn’t look like a gangster, but Nakamaru was getting used to all of these people looking prettier than his girlfriend in middle school. When Ueda took him here, he had passed by a gaggle of bright-eyed teenagers clutching weaponry, _all prettier than him_. Junno grabbed Nakamaru by the wrist, tugging him out of the small room that was clearly Ueda’s office. “I’ll introduce you to everybody,” Junno chirped.

Nakamaru bit his lip. “Uh.”

“I’m Taguchi Junnosuke. You can call me Junno, everybody does. Except when Uepi gets mad, he calls me Taguchi-san in a really scary voice.” They passed by a smaller gaggle of teenagers, who waved and greeted them with an out-of-tune chorus of, “Junno-sempai.” Junno continues, “Uepi always sends me out to kill people.”

“Uepi?” Nakamaru asked, trying not think about the fact that this was apparently one of Japan’s most feared hit-men—how could he have not made the connection between Junno and _Taguchi Junnosuke_ , suspected murderer of three CEOs, four celebrities, and one politician?

Junno beamed at Nakamaru. “That’s what I call Ueda. Because he’s cute and turns pink when we tease him. We also call him Tat-chan and whatever else will ruin his credibility as our boss, because he keeps trying to boss us around even though three years ago he told us he didn’t want to take responsibility for our antics anymore.”

Nakamaru snapped his mouth shut. Nothing Nishikido had said had prepared him for this.

Junno knocked on a door before opening it. “And these are the other important people in KAT-TUN. That’s what we’re called. KAT-TUN.”

Nakamaru tried not to choke.

*

Hidden in Commissioner Yamashita’s desk are several photos. Nakamaru saw them once, having been dared to go through Yamashita’s desk to find his porn stash. Nobody talks about these photos, even though everybody knows the contents of them.

Everybody knows about Yamashita’s friendship with Akanishi Jin, suspected gang member—“But you can’t prove anything,” Yamashita said flatly when confronted.

Everybody also knows about Yamashita’s short partnership with Kiritani Shuji, who was reported missing one month after their mission ended.

Kiritani Shuji’s supposed to be dead.

*

It was Nishikido’s training that kept Nakamaru from pointing at the man sitting next to Akanishi discussing firearms, and shouting: “But you’re supposed to be _dead_.”

Instead, Nakamaru swallowed hard, and focused on the burly man with tattoos sitting in the corner, _sewing_?

Junno tugged Nakamaru in. “This is Nakamaru Yuichi, guys,” he said cheerfully. “Nakamaru-kun, this is Kame-chan, Jin-kun, and Koki-kun.” He pointed at each of them in turn. Nakamaru nodded, matching names to faces. Kame-chan was Kiritani Shuji—it must have been a pseudonym, he realized now—Jin-kun was Akanishi Jin, and Koki-kun was the burly man with the tattoos.

Junno pushed Nakamaru towards a rickety chair, grabbing a cup of tea from the pot in the corner and shoving it into his hands. “Nakamaru’s new. Nishikido recommended him.”

Jin laughed. “Ryo-chan? What’s he up to now?”

“Who knows?” Kame replied. He flipped a knife over his wrist, tilting his head to the side and frowning. He turned to Koki in the corner, flinging an arm around the man and whining, “The balance is off. Fix it, please?”

Nakamaru blinked. Now that he had a better view of things, he could see that Jin and Kame were surrounded by a pile of weapons taller than Chinen-kun in the Traffic Bureau, and Koki wasn’t just sewing, he was fixing a knife-grip. Nakamaru sipped his tea to hide his nervousness. Was it too late to go to Yamashita and tell him that he really was horribly unqualified and that maybe Koyama would do a better job?

“Yes, yes. Go back and continue taking inventory before I stab you with this needle,” Koki said, pushing Kame away.

Junno laughed, draping an arm around Nakamaru and adding, “Koki is in charge of inventory and weapons. Uepi’s in charge information, Kame used to do undercover work but now he just stays at home and bosses us around.”

Nakamaru looked at the face he’s known as Kiritani Shuji. “And... Akanishi?”

Junno studied him curiously. “Akanishi does whatever needs to be done. Like me.”

*

“In one ear and out the other,” Taguchi Junnosuke said cheerfully as he packed up his gun. “Never liked that guy anyways. He could never take advice. I guess he never will now.”

Nakamaru tried not to look at the body pooling blood twenty stories below them. “Shouldn’t we be moving?”

Junno laughed. “Jin will clean up the mess.” He tapped his ear thoughtfully. “Kame?”

Nakamaru clenched his fists. He could have stopped this, maybe. He had known about this hit for a good two hours before it happened, he could have sent off a text to Nishikido or Yamashita or _something_.

“Kame says we’re staying here for a bit.” Junno leaned back against a wall and sighed. “What’s wrong? You look uncomfortable.”

“I’m... fine.” Nakamaru struggled to unclench his fists.

“Don’t tell me Nishikido was wrong about you,” Junno added.

“I...” Blind panic crept up Nakamaru’s veins. What did Nishikido say? What was he supposed to say? What if he said the wrong thing and the whole operation got busted? “I’m not sure,” he muttered.

Junno beamed. “Nishikido was dropping hints left and right that said you’d be a great asset to Kanjani, so Uepi grabbed you. Uepi must have seen something in you though, to just grab you like that. He didn’t even ask the rest of us what we thought, but only Kame would really protest because Kame’s always worried about police moles.”

Nakamaru swallowed, struggling to focus on Junno. If he ran, how far would he be able to get before KAT-TUN found him and hunted him down?

“Ah, and here they come,” Junno said, eyes narrowing in focus. He lifted a pistol to aim at the door. When the door burst open, Junno fired.

“Iriguchi, deguchi....” he murmured, watching as the police officer fell to the floor.

Nakamaru blanched, because that was Kusano, and Kusano was staring at him with a question of: _why aren’t you doing anything to help me_ but he couldn’t because damn it, he couldn’t blow his cover now, not when he was barely in and didn’t know what their motive was yet.

Junno smiled brightly, and Nakamaru tried not to think about the fact that Kusano was dying and Taguchi didn’t care and he wasn’t supposed to care because he couldn’t let his cover get blown now, he couldn’t.

Junno tugged Nakamaru on the wrist, nodding towards the door. As they passed Kusano’s prone body—don’t look at me like that, Kusano, I can’t help you, I can’t, Nakamaru thought—Junno murmured a quiet, “Taguchi desu.”

*

Nakamaru was pretty sure that his room was tapped, so he wrote his note in the code that he and Koyama had agreed on earlier. He tried to include as much information about KAT-TUN as he could, but there was always teenagers that Junno had called “Juniors” wandering around that Nakamaru couldn’t decide what their purpose was. Junno was maddeningly non-informative while remaining bright and cheerful, and Nakamaru wondered if that was the reason that he had been assigned to trail him.

Nakamaru didn’t know how to tell Koyama about Kusano.

*

“Come with me,” Junno said after Nakamaru had been undercover for a month already. He was feeling more comfortable with his assignment now, and having gotten to know the others, he almost felt like he belonged here.

Then he remembered Kusano.

“Where are you taking me?” Nakamaru asked, ignoring the warmth of Junno’s hand on his wrist.

“Shooting range!” Junno grinned. “You’ve been here for a month already, and it’s time you started handling a weapon. Kame-chan’s going to try to stab you with a knife later, but we’re going to check out your shooting skills.”

Nakamaru didn’t doubt that Kame _would_ stab him with a knife. Kame seemed like the type of person who would. And Koki. And Jin. And even Ueda.

Junno said thoughtfully as he handed Nakamaru a pistol, “I’ve had to teach all of Kisumai this before; hopefully you aren’t quite like them.”

“What do you mean?” Nakamaru asked, not bothering to file that new term somewhere in his head, caught up in the warmth of Junno’s smile even in still shooting range. Kisumai—he had heard that somewhere.

Junno smiled and pressed the pistol into Nakamaru’s hands. “Shoot.”

Training from the Police Academy took over, and before Nakamaru realized what was going on, he was staring a perfect bullseye.

“You’re my favorite, you know?” Junno murmured, flicking the safety as he leaned in, long arms wrapping around Nakamaru. He pressed a teasing kiss to the corner of Nakamaru’s mouth. “You’re even better than Nishikido suggested.”

*

A small part of Nakamaru felt like he belonged here, next to Junno as he took apart his gun and cleaned it. Yesterday, Junno had disappeared for a good hour, and on the radio, another politician died after making a series of foolish decisions that may or may not have been in conflict with KAT-TUN’s plans. Good, a part of him thought. Wrong, the other part thought.

“You killed him, didn’t you?” Nakamaru burst out as the newscaster continued discussing the ramifications of the politician's death.

Junno looked at him, continuing to put his gun together without looking at it. “What if I did?” His hair was no longer bright blond, but a muted brown. It suited Junno, and Nakamaru wondered when he started caring what shade of hair suited his enemies.

Nakamaru closed his mouth. He didn’t know what he’d do. He was falling too deep into this world, and Junno’s warm hands on his wrists and mouth on his weren’t helping matters.

*

“Send him to Yamashita,” Ueda suggested.

“You want me to send Nakamaru to Yamashita?” Kame demanded. Kame continued typing on his laptop, watching feeds from several cameras at the same time. He had always been good at multi-tasking.

“I know you two still talk to Yamashita. Jin especially. But Nakamaru... Yamashita doesn’t know Nakamaru. It’s our chance to get somebody in the police, somebody who Yamashita will trust completely and won’t just feed scraps of information.”

“My information network is perfect,” Kame retorted.

“Nakajima Yuto’s stuck in traffic and he _won’t_ advance. Yamashita’s not that dumb.”

A pause, and then Kame’s voice hissed out, “Nakamaru’s a wild card.”

“Exactly my point. Koki?”

“It’ll be a good test,” Akanishi Jin said instead. “Yamapi’s been quiet recently, and he shouldn’t. Not with us making so many moves.”

“Yeah,” Koki said. “Junno? Stop playing your games and focus.”

“I am,” Junno said, and his voice was cold and collected, not like the bright cheerful one that Nakamaru had already gotten used to. “It’s a test?”

“That hopefully Nakamaru will fail,” Jin said. “I’m starting to like having him around.”

Nakamaru closed his eyes and quietly padded away, not noticing the camera in the corner focusing and re-focusing on him. Perhaps he shouldn’t have followed Junno after Junno snuck out of bed.

*

Nakamaru waited for Junno to tell him that he was going to go back to the police. He folded and ripped apart the letters he had written to Koyama, long letters saying nothing but everything. He wouldn’t need to send them, after all.

Junno took him to the shooting range again, pressing a shot-gun to his hand. “Shoot it,” Junno said, looking serious.

“Junno?” Nakamaru asked. He lifted the shot-gun and aimed.

“Be careful of the recoil,” Junno said.

The recoil knocked the breath out of Nakamaru, but he stayed standing.

“You really were my favorite,” Junno said thoughtfully. “Too bad.”

Nakamaru didn’t see the gun slamming into his temple, only the way his vision slowly narrowed to a single prick of yellow light.

*

Nakamaru woke up in a small dark room, the only light coming in from a single fluorescent bulb hanging from the ceiling. It sent the room into a series of shadows, and Junno was sitting across the table from him, cleaning a gun.

“Junno,” Nakamaru murmured.

“You woke up,” Junno said. He put the pieces of his gun back together before sliding it into the back of his pants. “I wondered if I hit you too hard, but Uepi said you’d be fine.”

“I just have a headache,” Nakamaru said, ignoring the fact that his hands are tied behind his back and his legs are tied to a chair. Stay calm, he thought. He tried to remember what Nishikido said to do in case of capture, but he can’t remember.

“You should. I hit you pretty hard,” Junno said.

Nakamaru paused, watching as Junno fiddled with his fingers, before pulling out knives from his pocket. Small ones, large ones, curved ones. “What’s this about,” Nakamaru asked.

“It’s really rather simple,” Junno said as he carefully laid out six knives in a row. “We figured it out almost instantly. I suppose it wasn’t you fault you were sent in with inadequate information though.”

Inadequate. Yes, Nishikido’s information had been useful, but hadn’t been nearly enough to prepare him for this.

Nakamaru thought of the night before—or perhaps it was two nights before already. Junno had been warm and comfortable as Nakamaru waited for the news that he was being sent away.

“Do you regret anything?” Junno had asked thoughtfully. It was one of the few times Junno was serious around Nakamaru.

Nakamaru had looked at the bare walls covered in brightly-colored post-its, Kame’s favorite way to leave notes. “No,” he had said. “I chose this.”

“Oh?”

Nakamaru had reached for Junno’s hand. It had been warm and calloused, from killing, from murdering. “Yeah,” Nakamaru had muttered. “I choose this.”

“Too bad you’re a traitor, Maru. I really liked you,” Junno said, and Nakamaru remembered that they weren’t on Junno’s too small bed, staring at pink and orange post-its.

Nakamaru smiled. He wanted to say that he isn’t, not now, but he was. He’s still, a part of him, a large part of him is still a policeman. He just hoped that before Junno decides to pull the trigger that Junno would remember.

*

“I choose this.”

 

 

 

End.  
[Masterlist of fandoms here](http://virdant.livejournal.com/663.html)  
[Masterlist of Jpop fanfiction here](http://virdant.livejournal.com/36143.html)  



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